Though we may not always think about it when we’re taking them, pictures are invaluable.
When my mum died I found myself desperately needing to have photos to remember her by. Hoping that other people had taken photos of my mum, I combed through her possessions and my own childhood memorabilia looking for them.
I eventually managed to unearth few but they weren’t recent.
Then it hit me!If I died tomorrow Matilda would have very little evidence to show that I was in her life. Kuba spends relatively less time with her than I do but judging by the collection of photos on our computer you would assume the opposite.
I also have very few photos of my mother from my younger years. I think this was partly because of my mum’s reluctance to have her photo taken – a heartbreaking believing she wasn’t attractive enough to appear in photos.
Growing up, my mum was the most constant thing in my life and it saddens me that there is very little record of that.
Me and my mum, 1985
Earlier this year Cyndy Gatewood’s appeal to dads to take more photos of mums resonated with mothers to such an extent it went viral.
“I know you’re holding your phone right now. You probably always have your phone in your hand or at least in your pocket–we all do. Do her a favor and take more pictures.
No, not screenshots of a funny meme you just saw on Twitter.
I’m talking about pictures of her. The mother of your children. The love of your life. The one who works so hard with you to hold it all together for your precious family.
Take more pictures of her
Dads, if you have a wife like me, one night when she’s laying in bed reading a story to your daughter, whip out your phone and take a picture.
Just take the picture.
When she’s in the kitchen talking to your son about his day, take the picture.
If she’s rolling around on the floor with the kids or helping one with their homework, take the picture.
Time goes by so fast and everyday these sweet babies are getting older and older. Before we know it, they’ll be packing up their cars and moving off to college.
Take the picture.
One day she’ll be gone and all the kids have left of her are memories.
Take the picture.
Take the pictures to show them the love she had for them. Take the pictures so they can always remember how silly she was. Take the pictures so they can see how beautiful she was. It doesn’t matter if she’s in her pajamas and on day 4 of dry shampoo, please, take the picture.”
I don’t know about you but I shed a tear, or two – ok, more than that. And I started thinking of why is it that dads take so few pictures of mothers with their children?
It’s not as if taking photos is a particularly difficult task. Especially in this time and age where digital technology has removed any barriers to capturing precious moments. Even the simplest smartphone has a good camera, lowering the bar to a 5 seconds process of taking the phone out of the pocket, pointing and shooting.
So dads, please take more photos of your beautiful partners because one day we’ll be gone and our kids will want pictures to remember us by.
They deserve to have them and we deserve to be photographed, no matter if it’s in full makeup or while laying on the couch!
And dear mums! When 40 years from now, when we’re looking over old photos with our kids and perhaps their own children, we won’t remember that we were in desperate need of a make up. We’ll remember the laughs, the sillies, the genuine happiness we felt to be in the moment with our kids. I promise!
PS. Featured photo by Marta Wincenty-Cichy of Mum Way to Share